One Run

One run.  Seems simple enough.  Boring even to some.  I mean really, what’s the benefit that makes it so necessary?  Can one run change your life? Probably not.  Can it change your perspective? Most definitely.

Aside from the obvious physical perks of better health and all that goodness, some days that one run teaches me more about myself then I could have ever imagined….

Some things good, encouraging even; some things ugly, scary perhaps.

The lawyer in my head giving his best case as to why I should give up because the anvils I formerly called my legs are screaming for mercy.

The whining that can go on makes me want to run faster, away from myself!  I mean, I can’t stand when my daughter whines but when it’s the voice in my head I can’t escape, that will about make you mad.

Some runs feel like a nonstop battle of good vs. evil, which in and of itself can be utterly exhausting.

Those hard runs can stir those feelings of doubt, as a runner of course, but also as a wife, mother, friend?

 

But then there are those runs I didn’t want to do to begin with:

I was tired.

Not feeling good.

Not in the mood.

Oh so comfy snuggled in my bed.

 

And I went anyway. I won the battle with the nonsense excuses and told my body to get in line.

I ran even when it was hard.  I didn’t stop. 

I pushed boundaries. Pushed miles. Pushed pace.

I ran and ran and ran some more.

I finished the race.  Overcame the obstacles.

I superseded my own expectations (or even own limitations) to surprise myself. 

I PR’d.  I pushed myself to the limits and refused to concede.

 

Sometimes I finish those runs, the ones I didn’t want to get out of my warm heaven for, and feel as cruddy and exhausted as when I started.  It was hard.  My body was tired. There will always be those days.

But I learn from that one run.  Learn where there is still weakness.  Physically and mentally.  Where there is doubt in myself.  Fear, even. The question of ‘good enough’ will again rear its ugly head.

I also learn my strength.  Courage in the face of fear and doubt.  That my body is beautiful in so many ways.  That I am an overcomer.  That I am only required to give my best, in every situation, not perfection.  Give the best of myself to my husband, daughter, friends.

 And I learn that my feelings don’t rule my future. 

My doubts don’t dictate my destiny.

 My fear doesn’t determine my fate.

 Yes, I can learn all that from one run…..